“Try to grasp intelligently, by the proper exercise of your reason, the eternal spiritual truths taught by the Guru, the scriptures and the recognized saints, and regulate all the departments of your life in pursuance of them. The entire life ought to be directed towards perfect freedom from bondage, ignorance and sorrow”.
- Yogiraj Gambhirnath.
My Master always strongly stressed upon to “keep a diary” and write it every day, without fail, so that, one or the other day it may become a useful book for the other ones, as well. He used to add – “but you must write it in such a manner that it should work as an exemplary for the other condisciples. Let the people say, the same things did happened thousands of years ago that we had read it in other books about it. This book will be a proof that such things do not happen these days and will happen in future again; to the right people”.
This work is in strict compliance of my Revered Master.
Before I start with producing my own, date wise diary written beneath the lotus feet of my Holy-Master, I have been reflected upon, in to my beatific-vision, to reproduce the (translated) extracts of the diaries of my Grand Master, Rev. Laalaaji Maharaaj first, and then my Rev. father’s one and then on turn, of my own ones.
I believe, there might be the persons like the descendants of their quoted ancestors, are viewing this blog. It would be my dreamy-good fortune, if they oblige by sending the relevant photographs and the other allied materials to benefit me and also the other truth-seekers, around the world.
-Dinaysh Kumar Saxena.
Prophet Muhammad once said that on the Day of Judgment, a man's foot will not move unless he has answered four questions: Were he earned his money from, and were he spent it; how he spent his youth and how he used his knowledge. courtesy <http://spirituality.indiatimes.com>
Prayer conjures up an image of folded hands, closed eyes and lips (looks) moving soundlessly. But with new age spirituality having found a place in most lives these days, the word “prayers” has taken on several added meanings. Such as; says Sri Sri Ravishanker “an intense feeling of helplessness or an immense feeling of gratitude brings forth a state of being which is called prayer. The return of the small mind to the Big Mind (self) is prayer. When you recognize the love and care of the Divinity, you feel blessed. Blessing is not earned, it is a gift.” He puts it more succinctly – “Prayer fills up the emptiness, brings security and gives a sense of spiritual well-being. But for prayer, the heart needs to be open, and this can happen only through meditation and service”.
In this last phase of my life-span and especially in this eighth chapter of my ‘auto-biography; really I had a problem being considered spiritual and instead of revealing my experiences on ‘prayer’ and ‘meditation’, I am being bristled to considered overtly singing my own grand-children’s praises.
Divulging the fact about my idea to prolong the story, I want to take the viewers on the beneficent and delightful road of journey. The next station of this journey is a “soul-curry” but unlike of a feature writer one appearing in The Times of India who animated child-hood in the nearness of her “Daadi”, when she reach at the climax of her writing skill.
KANTI
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| Kanti my darling grand-daughter. |
Here the “soul-curry” is my darling grand-daughter, Kanti, a U.S. citizen who came to India with my daughter, Saarika (her mother) in the year 2004, as a three and half years’ child. She remained with me for more than three months and during this period, she was of and on, with me alone. We did “mastie” like any thing. Those days I acquired not only an immense pleasure but also a lot of spiritual food, too. This was a landmark of the purpose of my manifestation.
"Mastie” is a Hindustani-term; popularly miss-used to indicate the meaning of incidents related to passion or lust. But here it would simple to be taken as effusion of unrestrained joy. Although, at her parents’ abode situated at Rochester Hills, M.I. 48307 (USA), she was quite enriched with a well-equipped big bungalow, a big luxury car, and what not, but Kanti’s inborn nature was so untouched that I could never conceive, even a least, that she had ever perceived any sort of inconvenience at Fatehgarh; in her maternal kindred house, were the poverty-stricken upbringing manifested at every step. In the name of car, we had no vehicle, the house although a big one, but al-along extensively damaged. But Kanti was wholly drenched with love and kinship.
Kanti used to go with me, on-foot. She never demanded anything from me, even on my insistence. But after all Kanti was still a child of an innocent age. Her glance and the intellect, both were of extra-ordinary heights. There were still some articles on the shops which she did not want to ignore or loose to sight of. But at the same time she was bound to keep intact her mother’s words – “see Kanti! You will not oppress your Naanu (me)”. But Kanti was, after all, my grand-daughter. At such junctures, she used to stop – “Naanu! I am tired. Can I take some rest in this shop”. I had then, no option to affirm her proposal – “yes, why not”. This had always happened to be a photogenic scene. While the shopkeeper used to welcome Kanti, offer some choused toy and she was accepting the same with a divine-duality look; simultaneously, me and the shopkeeper. The words are failing to convey my conviction, what not Kanti’s innocence bestowed upon me and what should I call those incomings; whether the blessings or the showers of Divine Majesty, I could never grasp.
Even today the whole India is becoming mad after America. But Kanti’s first disliking was her own birth-land. She was ardently desirous to leave US, because of the three reasons, namely; (1) the people are non-vegetarians, (2) there are no friends, (3) lack of mutual-kinship.
Therefore to fill-up the empty-ness her appetite, she wanted remain amongst the people and used to avoid confining within an enclosing walls of the house. Then we took a decision to get her admitted in some play-group school. But the problem was that the Hindustani medium of instruction was not serviceable, because her mother-tongue was US English. After a long research, such a school could we recovered, which was run by a renowned Doctor’s housewife, were the newly admitted girl, Kanti was the fourth one.
I, a peculiar father, who seldom took his own children to the school to ask for the admission in, went for the purpose, holding my darling grand-daughter Kanti’s finger in my hand. I had taken her to school, half-heatedly, but she joined the class without any subterfuge. She did not come back home with me. This was a matter of not only the surprise but an untold fear also.
At the appointed hour when I went to the school, she was the only one, in the lap of a teacher, the daughter-in-law of the school in charge and Kanti was hardly prepared to cone down with me. With a great difficulty I could succeed to come out from the bewilderment, thank God, some how she became ready to move for. On way back replying to my quarry she revealed – “I wanted to go closer to Miss. Nicole (her teacher in US) but she never allowed even to touch. You know Naanu! You can’t realize how nicely today Baabiji (the teacher here by the same address, the other children used to call her) took me in goodi (bosom). Such warmth of love is indigestible to me”. Her eye-lids were wet and I was spell bound.
We both used to go to Laalaaji’s Samaadhi by cycle-rickshaw. On reaching there in, she used to unroll three grass-mates. On asking she used to reply – “this one is for you, next to you is for me and the third one is for Laalaaji”. This was a daily practice. One day I noticed, she brought only two mates. I inquired – “where is the third one?” she replied in a querulous-mood –“Laalaaji does not come out to sit near me”. Her counter question was –“why all the Samaadhis are made of stone?” I replied – “I will tell you later”.
Other day on the main road, I stopped a rickshaw and sooner she started to climb on the foot-board, the rickshaw-puller helped and made her seated nicely. On the way she asked me whisperingly – “Naanu! Should I call him (the rickshaw-puller) uncle”. Instead of giving any definite advice I simply told – “I will tell you later”. She became sad and kept mum. Kanti opened her lips on the main gate – “Naanu! You need not to reply my questions any more. Because Laalaaji himself has made me understood as to why the Samaadhis are made of stone”.
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| Laalaaji's Samadhi. |
I do not know; why Kanti stopped me to answer her questions further more and what Laalaaji had made her understood as to “why the Samaadhis are made of stone”. But her facial-expressions and the words released from her tongue took me at such a landmark, where I could stand and wait, meditating on the point, how she got Holy-touch of Laalaaji and through which she could get the right answer of all her questions, continuously for sixteen years. And now at this age of running 67, I got clarity of the whole issue that the inner interaction between my grand-daughter and my grand-father was not only an answer giving mode, but was also a forecast, what was going to happen after a gap of a couple of decades. It is, all along clear to me that ‘stones’ are far away from the world of human-beings, meditating for the promotion of their own souls, through the help of ‘Samaadhis’ of the Saints beyond their physical bondage.
I can now confirm the reason why the Naqshbandiya hierarchy of the Sufi-stream, imposed a limitation on the construction of the “Shrines” (Samaadhis) would be made of “kachchi” (unsealed or unheated) bricks only; what to say of stone. The Naqshbandiya Saints never die, they are called- “pardaa kar Gaye” (went beyond the veil). The world- “late” never added before the Holy-names of the saints of such heights.
I have gone through the personal diaries of my respected Father, Mahatma Jag Mohan Narain, where in, it has been mentioned specifically that the Samaadhi, of my grandfather, although being non-Muslim, but was since initiated in to the Naqshbandiya Silsilaa (hierarchy), was built within strict compliance of relevant discipline, as I have mentioned in the concerned chapter of this work, “My roots and the leaves”.
I do remember, soon after placing the 'Phools' (the remaining ones) of my grand-mother, Smt. Brijraani by the side of my grandfather’s one, it was under the process of its stone-tiles coverings, it had gone cracked by itself. And after wards what damages to our family and the other devotees were involved in it, had to suffer for, I will not mention in detail. But this much I will, purposely, mention here that the ‘Kachchaa’ (material mixed with clay and lime) plaster was left as it was.
When Baabuji, one of my grand father’s disciples (his namesake, Mahatma Ram Chandra of Shajahanpur) embarked on his mission and came in to the light, as the founder President, Sri Ram Chandra Mission, Shajahanpur; one of his co disciple, Shri Bhagwan Bharose Vaidya, requested him to send appropriate amount of money for the renovations of the said Samaadhi, to pay his (Baabuji’s) homage.
But Baabuji did not agree to his proposal, simply sending an account payee draft in favor of my own name, as token of respect for his Master, Laalaaji.
Here, I am mentioning this for some special purpose that although Baabuji, even in those times, enjoying his both the positions, i.e. his own and as a President, Sri Ram Chandra Mission, that he could have sent even several million of rupees, but it was perhaps his humbleness that he sent a token amount only.
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| baabuji of Shahjahanpur. |
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| Scaned copy of Baabuji's letter. |
Here, I am mentioning this for some special purpose that although Baabuji, even in those times, enjoying his both the positions, i.e. his own and as a President, Sri Ram Chandra Mission, that he could have sent even several million of rupees, but it was perhaps his humbleness that he sent a token amount only.
Now, not only me but the whole flock is at stake. Why? The same Samaadhi of my grandfather is presently under the process of covering fully of stones, my be providing a “Taj Mahal look”. To my estimation some 40 to 50 millions of rupees have already been spent on it and prima-facie a single person can not do it. I suspect the men on the nod of some anonymous missionary are daring to do all this. What so ever the fact there might be, but the persons, involved in the demolition of the design made by my respected Father, Mahatma Jag Mohan Narain’ have murdered my sentiments and I am very much sad over it. Time is the best healer and nature does not leave any body, who so there might be. God help me.
This has a significant reason is that the entry of the diary-extracts of a great Sufi-Saint is passing through the gate-way of the closed eye-lids in the images of his grandson’s grand-daughter. So, please enjoy the sweet moment intermingled with the ethereal-touch.
Laalaaji’s
Diary- Extracts
Of the year1931
January 01, 1931:
Baabu Kanhaiya Laal and Umaa Shankear went back home to day. Brijmohan came from Kanpur. Baabu Knhaiya Laal gave nazraanaa (an esteemed charity) of rupees 25/-.
January 02, 1931:
Brijmohan went to the house of Rai Saahib. Govardhan Daas, came from Etah along with his sister, at about 02.00(AM), in the night.
Annotations;
“Govardhan Daas” was the cousin- brother of my mother Mrs. Bhagwati Devi.
January 03, 1931.
Their arrived a turn of hot words exchange, during the course of conversion.
January 04, 1931:
The ‘Bay’t’ ceremony (esoteric-initiation) of Baabu Jagdambaa Prasad, of Hardoi, performed today.
January 08, 1931.
Shyaamaa, wife of Rudrasen and Jag Mohan’s wife (my mother went to the photographer’s shop for the photo-sketching.
Annotations; Rudrasen was the younger brother of Laalaaji’s son-in-law, Sri ShyamBehari Laal of Kotah (Rajasthan)
January 10, 1931.
Krishna Chandra Bhargave sent rupees 45/-.
January 12, 1931.
Left for Etah, by the morning train starting at 09.00 Hrs.
January 14, 1931.
Today on the festival of ‘Makar Sankraanti’, the ‘Bay’t’ ceremony (the esoteric initiation) of Baabu Avadh Behari Laal, his wife and Baabu Raadhaa Raman of Aligarh, performed.
January 15. 1931:
Reached at home after leaving Etah in the morning.
January 16, 1931:
“Lagun” (the party with formal proposal of marriage, according to the Hindu-customs) of Ram Prasad came from Delhi.
January 18, 1931:
Mats came from Shajahanpur.
The mention in the diary; "Shahjahanpur" is meant for Baabuji (Mahatma Ram Chandra, the founder President of 'Sri Ram Chandra Mission'.) When he had come to Fatehgarh, for the first time, he had seen the 'Satsang' was being conducted on the mats made of the date-palm leaves. His city Shahjahanpur is famous for the Kaaleens (Carpets). Therefore during the next visit, he brought two precious carpets, as shown near the tangible image of Laalaaji Maharaaj. But on a quarry by laalaaji, he had answered- "Sir, these are the bundles of some ordinary mats only".
Today it was death-anniversary of Baalkishaan’s father.
Annotation;
The mention in the diary; "Shahjahanpur" is meant for Baabuji (Mahatma Ram Chandra, the founder President of 'Sri Ram Chandra Mission'.) When he had come to Fatehgarh, for the first time, he had seen the 'Satsang' was being conducted on the mats made of the date-palm leaves. His city Shahjahanpur is famous for the Kaaleens (Carpets). Therefore during the next visit, he brought two precious carpets, as shown near the tangible image of Laalaaji Maharaaj. But on a quarry by laalaaji, he had answered- "Sir, these are the bundles of some ordinary mats only". Today it was death-anniversary of Baalkishaan’s father.
January 20, 1931:
Nanhe’s (Mahatma Raghuvar Dayal, his own younger brother) wife went back to Kanpur along with (her son) Jyoti (Mahatma Jyotendra Mohan Laal, the second of Mahatma Raghuvar Dayal).
January 23, 1931
Brijmohan left back for Bulandshahar in the morning at 09.00 Hrs. The marriage-party departed by the night train of 10.00 O’clock
January 24, 1931;
Left for Farrukhabad at 06.30 A.M., from where I had to catch the train for Delhi, fare paid three and quarter rupees. Reached Delhi in the evening at 06.00 Hrs. The marriage ceremony performed in the night
Annotations; This was the marriage ceremony of Sri Ram Prasad, the younger brother of Vaidya Baldeo Prasad Dalela.
January 25, 1931;
Today, it was the feast of “Bhaat”(a ceremony taking a place on the day of marriage, in which the bridegroom’s father is offered rice by family of the bride and presents are given to the bride, according to the Hindu-traditions). Went to the hotel of Baabu Bhagwat Prasad. Right from there, went to ‘Shriddhanand Bhavan’. There I met with Aanand Bhikchhu Ji. I also met with Munshi Jeeve Ram, along with his brother-in-law. Give an introductory (esoteric) sitting to Baabu Jamuna Swarup,
in the community-hall of ‘Bhagwat Swarup’s Hotel’.
in the community-hall of ‘Bhagwat Swarup’s Hotel’.
January 26, 1931;
Today, the feast of Barhaar (the main-feast given on the next day evening) was offered. I did not attended this feast because I had to attend Swami Aanand Bhikchhu Ji came to meet me, at the same hour. In the Chouk-are there was organized a very big procession of the freedom-fighters. This effected the whole Delhi and there were unusual lights arrangements. The lighting arrangements were done to celebrate the releases of so many prominent leaders. Jagmohan(my father) and Munshi Ji (Munshi Kaali Charan of Bhojpur, quite adjacent to eastward of Fatehgarh) left towards Kotah (Rajasthan).
January 27, 1931;
In the morning I again went to ‘Shriddhanand Bhavan’. There I met Narayan Ji Saraswati. He behaved with a great courtesy and hospitability. He promised to visit Fatehgarh, at my place and gifted me with two books. Next day morning I left Delhi by the 09.30 morning train.
January 29, 1931;
On reaching back Fatehgarh, engaged two labors on daily-wages.
In the after-noon, at 02.00 PM, Baabu Ajudhya Nath (brother of my grand-mother) returned back from Kotah.
In the after-noon, at 02.00 PM, Baabu Ajudhya Nath (brother of my grand-mother) returned back from Kotah.
January 30, 1931;
Brijmohan came from Kanpur, along with full family. Vaidya Baldeo Prasad offered “Nazraanaa” (Charity), rupees four only.
January 31, 1931;
Six and quarter anas (anas an unit denoted for sixteenth part of a rupee). Isavasya Upanishad taken by Bhavani Prasad, with my due permission. Bought Ghee on payment of rupees five only
February 01, 1931;
Maharaaj Narain (his son-in-law) left for Umrain Shibbaa (the house servant) left for his home-town along with Bhagol.. Doctor Saaheb came for departure of the bride and gave rupee one as a parting gift.
February 02, 1931;
One labor is working on daily-wage, today. The ‘Bay’t’ (esoteric initiation) ceremony of Kamalganj’s Puttu Laal, performed today. ‘Ken Upanishad is with
Munshi Chimman Laal.
Munshi Chimman Laal.
February 04, 1931;
The labors working at home have been settled their accounts today. Left toward Kanpur and Orai by the night train. Met with Baabu Guru Prasaad, Telegraphist, on the Railway-station. One and half annas (a coin equal to sixteenth part of a rupee) for the Tonga-fare and five and half annas train-fare, paid.
February 05, 1931,
Arrived at 08.00 A.M. on Kanpur Railway station. There was chilly-cold on account of snowfall. Leaving Kanpur at 10.30 A.M., reached Orai at about 12.30 A.M. took halt in the house of Baabu Suraj Prasaad. Nanhe (his own younger brother, Mahatma Raghuvar Dayaal) came from Kanpur in the night, itself
February 06,1931;
In the after-noon at 12.30 left towards Jhansi and reached there at 03.00 P.M. One Pundit Ji, Nayab Muhaasif Dafter (Assistant Office Superintendent) and Baabu Shardaa Prasaad ahalmad (court-clerk) came to meat along with Baabu Bhavani Prasaad, in the night.
February 07, 1931;
Met with Baabu Naaraayan Prasaad, Munsaram (Office Supdt), Jareeb (discharging the duties of surveyor). Took lunch at the house of the brother of Suraj Prasaad. There was Daawat (feast)-Bhaat. Given introductory esoteric-sitting to Pundit Ji, Nayab Muhaasif Dafter. One blind boy resident of Lucknow, requested for introductory esoteric sitting.
February 08, 1931;
There was in invitation for lunch at the residence of Baabu Baalaa Prasad, clerk. In the evening there was a feast of Barhaar. Today’s evening Satang took-place in the ‘Janwaasaa’ (living quarters of the bridegroom’s party, at the time of wedding), itself, wherein there were a lot of people joined in.
February 09, 1931;
Went to the house of Baabu Bhavani Shanker.
There I tried to impress on the mind of Baabu Shiv Dayaal. He showed his “vasvasi” (state of apprehension). A “general-tawajjo” (esoteric-attention) given to Baabu Shardaa Prasaad the clerk of Judge’s court, but I could not conclude the result. An offering of rupees two each given by Baabu Mevaa Laal and Bhavani Shanker. One blanket gifted by Pundit Naathu Raam, ‘Nayab Muhaasif Dafter of Judge’s court. Returned back from Orai by Mail Train.
February 10, 1931;
Given introductory esoteric sitting to Rangeele Laal, alias Khunkhun (Blind) resident of Lucknow. There was a general-feast at the resident of Laalaa Sukhvaasi Laal, today in the evening.
February 11, 1931;
Left at about 06.600 A.M. towards Kanpur side; Nanhe remain staying there, itself. Reached Fatehgarh at 05.00 A.M. There was a marriage-ceremony in the house of Baabu Kaashi Ram, Head Master.
February 12, 1931;
Buddhasen came today early in the morning and wept & wailed.
February 13, 1931;
Buddhasen came today again. Impressed upon him face-to-face that, this disease does dwindle scarcely.
February 14, 1931;
Took loan of rupees 70/- only, from Laalaa Bishun Datt.
February 15, 1931;
Today it was ‘Shivraatri’. Left towards Manipuri by the day train, leaving Farrukhabad Railway station at 12.00 O’clock. Reached there at 04.00 P.M. Camped in ‘Mandir-Chittragupta’, where I conducted evening ‘Satsang’. A good number of Ladies too attended it. Father of Sreepat Sahai also came to attend the ‘Satsang’. Thereafter it happened to visit the place of Munshi Chet Ram; I got it through him that he (the father of Sreepat Sahai) had been associated with an ascetic and now he has no inclination towards this side (ours way of soul-promotion), on account of this reason only he did not feel any interest in.
February 16, 1931;
Today in the morning also conducted the ‘Satsang’. Given introductory esoteric-sitting given to Aanand Swarup, Kurk-Amin (court officer employed to attach property). In the night, Aasha Ram Punjabi, of Hoshiyarpur (Punjab) and in addition, another boy-student, resident of kherha, both separately were given introductory esoteric-sittings. In the day-time, went to the house of Munshi Har Narain Mathur, Mukhtyar (Advocate), Chaachi (aunt) gave me rupee one. In the night again conducted a group-satsang, along with the ladies.
February 17, 1931;
Today went for lunch at the house of Bhajan Laal, where I gave an introductory esoteric-sitting to his sister. Bhajan Laal’s wife gave me an offering of rupee one only. In the afternoon, left towards Bhogaon. In the night conducted a group-Satsang along with the ladies. During night went for the toilet for five times. Keshav Ram left for his relative’s house to Mainpuri, due to his sickness.
February 18, 1931;
Conducted a group-Satsang today, again. Went to visit the condition of the garden, to which I found in a very bad state of affairs. So many trees were found to be cut-off, the branches of so many trees were cut-away and the animals were eating in a crude way. Shyam Laal is a relative of Magan Behari Laal; he has discussed about his law-suit. Met with Khaan Saaheb. The sister-in-law of Ram Kishan Laal requested for the “Bay’t”, but when its truth was explained, then she became silent.
February 19, 1931.
Arrived at Manipuri after leaving from Bhogaon by the 09.00 A.M. train and from there, left towards Etah along with Sreepat Sahai. The bus became out of order en-route. Reached Etah late in the evening. Ram Sahai and the other ones were present there. Conducted a group-Satsang.
February 20, 1931;;
Quazi Ji and the other Maulwies came to meat me. Nannhe and Sukhvaasi Laal came from Kanpur via Shikohabad.
February 21, 1931;
Today also, Quazi Ji Saaheb and the other Muslims etc. came and joined the group-Satsang. Fatiha (offerings in the names of saints) was also performed. The ‘Prasaad’ (propitiatory-sweets) was distributed from the side of Baabu Ulfat Rai Saaheb. Performed the tradition of ‘Bay’t’ (esoteric- initiation ) of Munshi Suraj Sahai Mukhtyar.
February 22, 1931;
Conducted a group-Satsang. The introductory (individual) esoteric- sittings were also given to the uncle of Hori Laal, another one, who is employed in the Municipal-Board and one another by-caste ‘Kahaar’, who came with Hubbaa Laal Patwaari.
February 23, 1931;
Today in the morning went to the house of Ram Sahai and returned in the evening. One Pundit Ji , Aachaarya School Master Etah with me, to whom I tried to explain the system. He agreed to some extent. Baabu Suraj Sahai and Ram Sahai made the offerings of rupees eleven each.
February 24, 1931;
Left towards Kasganj. The Bus failed at several places en-route. Reached Kasganj late in the evening Then I was suffering badly by the head-ache etc. Meet with Master Saaheb Baabu Basant Laal. Met also with Munshi Chhedaa Laal, the maternal uncle of Munshi Umaa Shanker, who is a pensioner, along with his sons. Two more; one of them is the relative of Fateh Laal and the other one was a school-teacher; met all of them. The head-ache and tooth-ache, both increased in the night to the maximum extent.
February 25, 1931;
To day left for Fatehgarh by the day train of 12.00 O’clock. In the evening the Assistant Surgeon, Mohammad Omar Saaheb visited to my house, Madho Prasad Compounder was with him. In the night I felt low fever.
February 26,1931;
Baabu Krishna Narain Sen Vakil came to day in the morning and discussed in respect of joining the ‘Satsang’. The approved sketch-plan of our house received today. The census took place in the night. Ram Kishan came from Kanpur along with his child for purchasing ink.
February 27, 1931;
Today in the morning given ‘tawajjo’ (esoteric-attention) to Baabu Krishna Narain Sen and his wife. No favorable effect felt, even after the repeated one in the evening. Ram Kishan returned back to Kanpur in the evening.
February 28, 1931;
The door got fitted in the Elmira of the room. One more tawajjo was given to Baabu Krishna Narain Sen and his wife. Still no effect on Baabu Krishna Narain Sen, but of course, a little effect was felt on his wife.
March 01, 1931;
Today I did not go to the house of house of Vakil Saahib. The “masaanah’ (urinal-bladder) became loose. Have a dream during night Janaab Qiblaa Maulaana Saaheb (his spiritual Master) in the state of dispute and much worried. Did not find any reason.
March 02, 1931;
For the last two days, there are clouds all through. Feeling very bad. The person employed to paint on the doors, run-away steeling the paint itself. Offered ‘Fatiha’(recited the prayers given in the first chapter of Holy-Quran) in the room built recently on the first –floor.
March 03, 1931; (auspicious moment of Holly-festival)
A letter received from Etah sent by Baabu Avadh Behari Laal. His younger brother, Prem Behari Laal has been blessed with a male-child on 28th February 1931, at 08.30 A.M. ‘Dashthaun’ (the ceremony of naming the child after birth) has been fixed for the 9th instant, I have been invited to attend there for. The wife of Baabu Aanand Swarup passed away in Kanpur.
March 04, 1931;
Akshat (the whole grains of rice) offered at the Holikaa-dahan today at 07.30 A.M. People came to meat in the formal-manner on the holly-festival. Intake nothing on account of toothache.
March 05, 1931;
A letter delivered sent by Mukundi Laal, mentioning there in that his marriage has been fixed for the 9th of March. Another letter sent by Mathanni (his cousin brother- Dr. Krishna Swarup of Jaipur) has also been received. Rupees twenty received through money order sent from Orai. Conducted Satsang at the house of Magan Behari Laal.
March 06,1931;
First volume of ‘Yoagavashishtha’ taken by Pnditji the Office Superintendent of Judge’s Court. First volume of ‘Complete works of Swami Ramteerth’ taken by Baabu Raghuvar Dayal, court-clerk of Quota-wards.
March 10, 1931;
Baabu Bhagwat Prasaad Bhatnagar came from Chandausi. Went to the ‘Dentist’. Went again to the house of Baabu Krishna Narain Sen. There was a feast in the house of Peshkaar Saaheb.
March 11, 1931;
Today remain feeling much weakness. Did not go to the ‘Dentist’ because, not known which tooth would he root-up.
March 12, 1931;
Rupees nine and twelve annas and rupees five sent by Shreekishan and Balveer Sahai, respectively. A letter has come from Bahadur Singh, the Circle Inspector of Sawaaizpur. Baabu Raadhaa Raman came from Aligarh. The father-in-law of Baldeo Prasaad expired in the day at 02.00 P.M. Lying un-slept through the night.
March 13, 1931;
None of the community, except Laaltaa Prasad, came to take the body for cremation. Pundit Maaan Singh has been blessed with a male-child.
March 14, 1931;
Bhagwan Prasaad, Overseer took ‘Bay’t’ (the tradition of esoteric initiation). Raadhaa Raman proceeded for Aligarh.
March 17, 1931;
Wife of Jagmohan felt pain arisen to miscarriage and the wife of Peshkaar Saaheb also felt the same type of pain, in the night.
Annotations;
The former one, was the third wife of his own son, i.e. my mother Bhagwati Devi
March 18,1931;
A money-order for rupees ten only has been sent by Master Ram Singh of Agra..
March 19,1931;
A sum of rupees ten only has been sent by Seetaa Ram, from Lucknow. Baabu Bhagwat Prasad proceeded for Delhi in the night.
March 20, 1931;
A letter has come from Allahabad written by Baabu Kanhaiya Laal., mentioning their in much of his troubles. A sum of rupees fifteen only has sent by Baabu Rajendra Kumar. At about 03.00 P.M. in the day I felt a high powered feverishness. The work of repairing of the house, therefore, totally stopped, today.
March 23, 1931;
Got an attack of high fever, there is unbearable headache. The temperature increased afterwards. Rupees thirty have come from the Allahabad-Satsang. Maataacharan came.
March 24, 1931;
The condition of “Dulhan” (daughter-in-law) again relapsed today. Through the day and night, she felt un-bearable pain.
March 25, 1931;
Munshi Singh has given rupees two only. Mrs. (Dr.) Chhote Laal called upon to examine “Dulhan”.
March 26, 1931;
In the morning at 08.00 A.M., a mail-child miss-carriages. A sum of rupees fifteen sent by Dr. Shyam Laal. A strife has started in Kanpur.
March 28, 1931;
Last night, there was a discharge of urine of earthen-water-pot full. Today is the day of ‘Ram Nowmi’ (the birth day of Lord Ram). Today there is a very hot news of “Kanpur-strife”. A rumor has also been heard of quarrels in Fatehgarh-Farrukhabad.
March 29, 1931;
No news ascertained from Kanpur. Come a crossed a conversation evoking-wonder, through a “deewaan” (head-constable) of Police-Kotwaali, the root-cause of which, it was beyond my understanding. A Brahmin-boy came from Kanpur, went through whom, that he had seen Jyoti Baabu in Nawaabganj(Kanpur). There was a feast in the house of Baabu Laxmi Dayaal. There was a function in the ‘Chittragupta-Temple’ for construction of its building.
March 31, 1931;
A telegrammed message has been sent to Nawaabganj(Kanpur), enquiring about their welfare. No response of the telegrammed-message received. Came to know through the brother of
Ahibaran Singh that ‘he’ was in Nawaabganj.
Ahibaran Singh that ‘he’ was in Nawaabganj.
April 01, 1931;
The response of the telegrammed message has come from Kanpur that all the people in Kanpur are safe. The ‘Laddoos’(an Indian sweet) have been made ready.
April 02, 1931;
All the persons have come from Kanpur. Ram Dayaal came from Aligarh along with his sister-in-law. Kishan Swarup has come from Ajmer.
April o3, 1931;
Incoming of people has begun.
April 04, 1931;
Baabu Raam of Majhola (Shajahanpur), Bhanwrpaal Brahmin of Agra, Munshi Singh of Nagariya, District Hardoi, Kaashi Naath (Brahmin) of Gorakhpur, Baabu Raghuveer Prasaad of Agra, Baabu Fateh Laal of Kasganj, and Baabu Sheoti Prasaad of Kasganj,
took Bay’t (the traditional ceremony of esoteric linkage). Maulvi Saaheb has honored to come from Sirsaganj.
took Bay’t (the traditional ceremony of esoteric linkage). Maulvi Saaheb has honored to come from Sirsaganj.
April 05, 1931;
Maulvi Saaheb honored to go back, today in the after-noon at 03.00 P.M.
April 06, 1931;
Brijmohan returned back to Fatehpur.
April 07, 1931;
The teeth have been rooted off.
April 08, 1931;
Nanhe (Mahatma Raghuvar Dayaal) has gone to Manipuri, along with Maataa Charan.
April 09, 1931;
Munshi Man Mohan Laal of Sikandrabaad (Bulandshahar),
Baabu Koruna Shanker of District Shahjahanpur and Kunwar Ram Singh of Saangaaner, Manoharpura (Jaipur) took Bay’t (the traditional ceremony of esoteric linkage).
Baabu Koruna Shanker of District Shahjahanpur and Kunwar Ram Singh of Saangaaner, Manoharpura (Jaipur) took Bay’t (the traditional ceremony of esoteric linkage).
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| Kuwanar Ramsingh of Jaipur. |
Thakur Saheb was born on 3rd September 1898 in a small village in Jaipur, India. He was from an elite Rajput family. His father was in service of Jaipur Empire.
Since childhood, Thakur Saheb was deeply religious. He received his education in Nobles School, Jaipur and acquired knowledge of Urdu, Persian and English besides Hindi.
He was married at the age of seventeen. His wife, Gopal Kanwar was indoctrinated by her father Shri Arisal Singh to lead a flawless and exemplary life. Her complete life was an epitome of love, compassion and asceticism. She was fully committed to her consort and helped him to practice his spiritual pursuits.
Thakur Saheb was in service of police. He joined as a constable and was later promoted to Thanedar. He was posted at various places before he resigned in 1944.
This was the sublimity of this man. In the service of police, amidst an environment of all the vices and depravity, he not only managed to preserve his sensitivity and human values but could attain the stage of Superconsciousness, termed as enlightenment.
(Courtesy from http://www,jollycreations.com )
(Courtesy from http://www,jollycreations.com )
One Shri Kishan Chandra Bhargava who was PWI in the Railways gave him a photograph of Mahatma Ram Chandraji. He was posted in Palsana those days. He started meditating on that photograph and started receiving spiritual radiations. He wrote a letter to Mahatma Ram Chandraji expressing his inability to personally visit him. Quick came the reply. Mahatma Ram Chandraji wrote back to him that he himself was coming to Jaipur and would meet him then. A few days later Mahatma Ram Chandraji arrived and when he saw Thakur Ram Singh, he remarked, ‘Ram Singh, you are exactly the same as I had seen you’, though they had never met before. Mahatma Ram Chandraji stayed in Jaipur for three days and during this stay he also visited Manoharpura. Thakur Ram Singhji used to say that his condition after his first meeting with Mahatma Ram Chandraji was explained by a couplet sang by the tongawala on his return in a tonga:
‘Ajab tere ishq ka yeh asar dekhtan hoon,
Ki tarakki pe darde jigar dekhtan hoon,
Samaya hai jabse tu meri nazar mein,
Jidhar dekhtan hoon tujhe dekhtan hoon.’
(I see a strange effect of your love that the pain of love in my heart is ever growing. Ever since I have seen you, wherever I see, I see you alone.)
‘Ajab tere ishq ka yeh asar dekhtan hoon,
Ki tarakki pe darde jigar dekhtan hoon,
Samaya hai jabse tu meri nazar mein,
Jidhar dekhtan hoon tujhe dekhtan hoon.’
(I see a strange effect of your love that the pain of love in my heart is ever growing. Ever since I have seen you, wherever I see, I see you alone.)
Later Mahatma Ji, who is also called Lala Ji lovingly by his followers, showed up himself to meet Thakur Saheb and even went to his village. After being face to face with his Master, Thakur Saheb says, "Only a few days after having his darshan, I started feeling as if I am moving as my Guru Bhagwan moves; I am seeing as my Guru Bhagwan sees".
One of his favourite Ghazal was:
Tere ishq ka ye asar dekhta hun, tarakki pe darde jigar dekhta hun;
Samaaya hai jab se tu meri nazar mein, jidhar dekhta hun tujhe dekhta hun.
Samaaya hai jab se tu meri nazar mein, jidhar dekhta hun tujhe dekhta hun.
(The consequence of my passion towards you is that it is afflicting more and more. Since your being immersed into my eyes, only you are visible everywhere)
His whole life afterwards felt presence of his Master near him. The life became more and more blissful and he attained the super state of ananda.
His compassion transcended all barriers. He is known to feed thieves and criminals during their detention in the police station before partaking himself. He used to cook himself for his "guests". People narrate incidents of his empathy for the camel he rode. After a long ride, he would caress the animal and knead its legs. His pledge towards truth was so much that he was regarded by equal respect by judges and criminals. Under his remand, criminals accepted their offence without any coercion. This was the power of his truthfulness.
He symbolised samarpan, total let-go towards his Guru Bhagwan. He melted down his self, his ego at the feet of his able Master. To those who came near him, he advised to always accept the will of God. "Razi hain hum usi mein jismein teri raza hai" (I give in to Your will).
Thakur Saheb left his body in the early morning on 15th January 1971. A samadhi mandir has been built at the place where he was cremated. Many people visit the place to pay homage, get solace and to perform sadhana in the energy field of his samadhi. Every year, on 14th and 15th January, a large congregation of his followers is held where his grace is remembered by his lovers and guidance for spiritual elevation is provided by patriarchs of this path.
After getting inspired through the living image of Rev. Laalaaji Maharaaj, Thakur Saaheb got an impression that the person who is so strongly attracting his mind must be the master of the knowledge containing the subject of mesmerism. With the same conception, he immediately revealed his mind to him through a letter.
The response of Laalaaji’s letters are appended below:-
(1.)”Fatehgarh; dated April 19, 1929;
Received your letter. May God motivate you to go towards the Truth! I shall be very happy when you meet me. I do not know the mesmerism, even the least. Moreover, this path leads towards darkness. If you have merely the desire for mesmerism, then you need not to take trouble. I am basically only for the names sake and I have diverted my vision towards God. I do not know other than this. If you have desire concerning the self-realization, then this humble fellow shall remain be waiting for.”
(2)”Fatehgarh; dated June 16, 1929;
You have written: ‘I felt worried at heart, when I did not receive the reply’. The reply in the form of alphabets and the words written on paper give a sort of solace. This proves that the nature and worldly objects also provide contentment and happiness, but it may be temporary and for the short duration.
The real thing as what is required from you and every being and the same exists within, only the vibration of the thought is needed. This vibration of thought can be obtained at the attendance on the Satguru (Satsang). The true association with the equal beings. Equal beings are called human-beings (living Gurus). When human beings gets the association of a capable human being, then one acquires vibrations, power, and the peace. And this method is sufficient to serve the needs of an inquisitive person. A capable human is an image of body and soul. Similarly a man and also the bad man are made up of body and soul, both. The soul is expanded every where and is in an unlimited form.
The soul gets benefit from both, near as well as from far-off. But since the body is limited and is in gross form, it gets beefit and harm frm the near. It means that body and soul are very deeply intermingled. Hence, in the beginning there falls the need for nearness, as well as face to face association. Without this, one does not gain benefit as one should obtain in the beginning. If some one has such a capability that one can obtain benefit and instructions through thought from distance, then one does not have need for obtaining instructions and that to from some special person. He himself is capable. Why should a capable one (living Guru) search for? If there is not such capability, then there is need to come close to, face to face, because without it the purpose can not be served upon.
You want to have vocal and written instructions through letters, it can be and it also happens so. But this is of the level as it is one’s status. What ought to be; that can not be obtained. Therefore, please find feasibility to come and see me at least once, or if I could get opportunity, I shall see you”.
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| R.K.Gupt |
In homage to his Spiritual-Prefect, Th. Ram Singh Ji of Jaipur, Mr. R. K. Gupta, writes; "At the time of annual Bhandara of his Guru Bhagwan Mahatma Ram Chandraji Maharaj, Thakur Ram Singhji used to take two towels with him to Fatehgarh, one the usual full-bigger towel and the other one a smaller towel. He used to get up very early in the morning, before any one else would get up and then he would wash the Samadhi of Mahatma Ram Chandraji Maharaj, pulling water from the well himself and using the bigger towel and then used to clean the Samadhi with the smaller towel. This he followed on all the days of the Bhandara. He used to take these towels back with him. The bigger towel he would use for himself untill it was no longer usable and then he would make a rope from it for hanging clothes on the rope. The smaller towel he used to put on his pillow while sleeping, as if he was sleeping in the lap of his Guru Bhagwan. Besides all through the Bhandara he used to pull out water from the well located within the Samadhi premises for use by all the visitors for their bathing etc. Even on insistence, he did not let any one else to pull out water. Now this well has been covered up."
April 10, 1931;
Krishna Swarup has come back from Bhogaon and then again went to Kanpur. Sent rupees 09.00 to Gwalior and rupees 03.00 to Unnao, through Moneyorder.
April 11, 1931;
Now I am feeling better as compared to the previous days. Vakil Saaheb asked again to gain spiritual-promotion. Kunwar Ram Singh went back to Jaipur. The people of Shahjahanpur have also went back.
April 12, 1931;
Pundit Rameshwar Prasaad went back to Shahjahanpur.
April 13, 1931;
Jagmohan (my father) made to take steam-bath. His mother’s condition has gone bad as compared to the other days. Dr. Maqsud Ali Saaheb has been called upon to treat her.
April 14, 1931;
Munshi Man Mohan Laal went back to Sikandrabaad (Bulandshahar). Kishan Swarup came back from Kanpur. Today I got my urine tested by Dr. Maqsud Ali Saaheb. He has diagnosed the ‘diabetes’.
April 15, 1931;
Krishna Swarup to Ajmer and Munshi Aatmaa Ram to Kanpur; went back
April 16, 1931;
Today have taken the medicine made by Mushily(a purgative); four-five motions came, but did not feel refreshed. The whole family, including Jaggu’s mother (my grandmother), Jaggu (my father) himself, Bittan, Babban (my father’s sisters), all have fallen sick.
April 17, 1931;
The treatment of Dr. Sayad Ahemaad Ali, started from today. There was a feast in the house of Magan Behari Laal. Maataa Charan came. Babban (his daughter Mrs.Krishna Kumari the wife of Sri Maharaj Narain) is suffering from high temperature; she remain uneasy.
April 18, 1931;
The fever relapses again to me but it was bit light, but I remain restless and could not sleep.. Ram Kishan and Ram Gopal came, but soon his wife went back.
April 20, 1931;
Ram Kishan and Ram Gopal went back. I could not intake any thing. Some talks of strife’s I heard inside the house, which I could not know the cause but I could some how guess about.
April 21, 1931;
There is transgressive disaster, I am feeling on my heart; how is that such sort of questions and concerns are being occurred, in my own family also, for the same ones, we forbid for the others. This is my own enfeeblement; otherwise, God has already enriched me all the affluences. I am feeling much weakness.
April 22, 1931;
Described the state of my mind before Baabu Ram Charan Laal Expert of Moradabad. There was “Mundan” (‘first ceremonial shaving of a child’s head’) in the house of Baabu Dayaa Shankar Vakil. Did not intake the doctor’s medicine; instead I took tub-bath for seven minutes, which gave me favorable results and I felt much vigor.
April 23, 1931;
Some hymnographers (concerned with devotional songs) and didactics have come to stay in my room.
April 24, 1931;
Munshi Manmohan Laal Saaheb and Dr. Shree Krishna Laal have come today.
Param Sant Mahatma Shri Krishna Lal Bhatnagar ji Maharaj was one of the most stridently devoted disciples of Pujya Lalaji Maharaj. He established Ramashram Satsang of Sikandrabad in 1939 to propagate the message of his beloved gurudev. The love and purity in thought and action that he demonstrated attracted many followers, whom he imparted spiritual knowledge and welcomed into his world. He attained nirvana in 1970 while doing the work of his Guru.
There was a programmed function of ‘Keertan’ (Devotional songs) in our house.
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| Dr.shrikrishanlal. |
There was a programmed function of ‘Keertan’ (Devotional songs) in our house.
April 25, 1931;
There took place a ‘Lecture’ of Pundit Ruddradatta Ji in the morning. A nice meting with Swaami Satyavrat Ji. Munshi Manmohan Laal left for Shahjahanpur. There was a function of ‘Aarya Samaaj’. A midwife, an employee of Municipality, has been called upon to examine Jagmohan’s wife (my mother).
April 26, 1931;
There was a function of Aarya Samaaj, today.
April 27, 1931;
Aarya Samaaj’s function is continued. Dr. Shree Krishna Laal left for Sikandrabaad. Munshi Manmohan Laal returned back from Shahjahanpur. The Aarya Samaaj function concluded today.
May o2, 1931;
Today there was a feast in the ‘Guard-line’, but could not go. It has been heard that Naaraayan Swaami has come from Lucknow. Received the Pension. Went to listen the lecture of Naaraayan Swaami in the ‘Guard-line’.
May 03, 1931;
Listened the lecture of Naaraayan Swaami in Fatehgarh.
May 04, 1931;
Proceeded towards Sikandrabaad(Bulandshahar), along with Munshi Manmohan Laal Ji and Sushilaa(my father’s sister, affectionately called, “Sheelaa”) etc., reached Shikohabaad, started from there at 01.45 and then we reached at our destination at 06.oo P.M. Experienced none sort of inconvenience, en-route.
May 05, 1931;
Went for the medical-examination to Munshi Masood Aalam Saaheb ‘Tabib’ (medical-man, called Haqeem). To day I cold took my meals with inclination.
May 06, 1931;
Today I got examined by Munshi Mahmood Ali ‘Tabib’; the treatment included the Unaani-medicines also.
May 07,1931;
During whole of the day, I got an attack of toothache and also the headache, but not very acute one. A letter written by Baabu Suraj Prasaad from Orai, mentioning there in that he is still not well; there is an attack of cough and cold.
May 08, 1931;
There was an invitation for the dinner in the house of Bhajan Laal, for the mother of Sushilaa (my grandmother), there she objected on the uneven serials of dishes, consequently she got ill. Haqeem Saaheb went to examine her pulse.
May 09, 1931;
Right from today I came to the house Shree Krishna and then took food. Treatment in run of all the family members stopped and today too, Haqeem Saaheb examined the pulse.
May 10, 1931;
A laip (a medical plaster) got put on the stomach, i.e. on the ‘liver’, today. Two-three loose motions came. Started to explain the ‘Ramayana’.
May 11, 1931;
Proceeded for Delhi in the morning. Went there to the house of Rai Saaheb Dayaa Shankar and wherefrom again went to the Tibia College and got examined by Biswaas Baabu. Then went to the Hotel, where organized a meeting with some modern men and women. Returned back in the evening. Baabu Bhagwat Prasaad came along.
May 12, 1931;
Letter written by Jagmohan has come today. Started to intake the medicine of Delhi. Sent reply of the Jagmohan’s letter. Baabu Shyam Laal went back.
May 15, 1931;
Pundit Kaashi Naath Ji from Meerut and Baabu Rajendra Kumar came from Agra today. I could not intake the food today.
May 16, 1931;
Shreekishan, Mahaadev Swarup, Baabu Bhajan Laal and Dr. Shyam Laal have gone today to Delhi to purchase a motor-car. Today I took bath, because the permission letter of Doctor Saaheb had sent.
May 17, 1931;
Dr. Shyam Laal got inaugurated it by making seated my whole family including Sheelaa and the other ones in his motor-car. He gave me “nazraanaa”, i.e. an esteemed offering of rupees five only, with his eye-lids down.
Annotations;
My Spiritual-Prefect, Dr. Shyam Laal Saaheb used to animate the story of the truth between the lines of the above diary-extract, with a gleam on his look. On account of his acute weakness, when Laalaaji was found unable to undertake journeys by train (of those times) for taking him to various places for the treatment and was decided to take him comfortably in a car, which none of the flock had of his own then and there. Rai Saaheb Baabu Indra Narain, a king-like Land-lord of Sakit (Etah), one of the close family-flock from the maternal-kindred’s side of my grandmother, sent a message on his own accord that he would give his own Luxury-car for the mentioned purpose, provided a person knows driving is sent bring the same. Immediately, my Gurudev (Dr. Shyam Laal) volunteered himself. But on reaching there Rai Saaheb showed his pretext. My Gurudev took it insulting for his Master for whose cause he had gone there. He used to tell, in short, he sold-out all the jewellery not only of his own family but also of the family Rev. Dr. Shree Krishna Laal Saaheb and from the total sale-proceeds he purchased the car, as mentioned in the diary of my Grandfather.
May 18, 1931;
Could not intake any thing throughout the lay-long; no hunger to be felt by. Fourth day’s fever, Sushilaa is suffering from and has not come down. Maulawi Mushtaaq Ahemad came to meat, along with Haafiz Saaheb. Kanhaiya Laal’s letter has come from Allahabad.
May 19,1931;
Went to Delhi with Munshi Mukund Swarup. Got examined by Mozmdaar Ji. Returned back in the evening. Suffered a lot on account of fast pace wind, en-route, I have not been able take food for the last two days. Head Master Saaheb went back to Meerut. Meeting held with Baabu Shyaam Sunder Manyaa and Shiv Shankar Laal.
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| Shiv Shankar Laal. |
May 20, 1931;
State of health has gone exceedingly spoiled. Got examined to Dr. Shambhu Prasaad, he ascertained the entire particulars. No clear motion, nor I cold eat any thing.
May 21, 1931;
Today also no clear motion came, nor could intake any thing. The treatment of Delhi stopped and came to Bulandshahar in the evening time. There I got examined to Dr. Chunni Laal.
May 22, 1931;
The treatment of Dr. Chunni Laal has been started from today. He has recommended milk and the fresh-fruits only. Feeling better today
May 23, 1931;
Baabu Rajendra Kumar’s letter has come to call me there, but the advise of this doctor and the same of there’s, both agreeing each other therefore, I postponed to move further.
May 24,1931;
Proceeded from here at 05.30 A.M. by car along with Mahaadev Swarup. Met with Gauri Shankar and Kedaar Naath in Aligarh and then again proceeded for Etah, where we reached at 10.00.A.M. I camped in Etah whole day and the night and met with the all ones.
May 25, 1931;
Proceeded towards Fatehgarh from Etah. Reached Fatehgarh at 09.00 A.M. Friend, Jeevgangaa Bhaartiya Ji found staying. Meeting with Maulawi Aabid Ali Saaheb and Vaidya Ji endowed abundantly with, en-route in Bhogaon itself. At 10.00 O’clock in the three came from Allahabad, introduced by Baabu Gangaa Sahai o f Yaaqutganj (Fatehgarh). Given introductory-individual esoteric sittings to them.
May 26, 1931; (a recurring festival of “Gangaa-snaan”)
Started to take ‘tub-bath’ from today. The women to whom the “Updesh” (the introductory-individual esoteric sittings) was given yesterday came and given them the second sitting. Baabu Raam Kumaar in-charge R.M.S. of Kasganj and Baabu Bhajan Laal came along with family. The Ladies came from Allahabad given an offering-gift of rupees four only to “Babban” (my father’s sister, actual name ‘Krishna Kumaari’).
May 27, 1931;
No fresh happening. Ram Kishan Laal came from Bhogaon. Goswaamiji, Sunder Laal, Puttu Laal, Ram Kishan, Umaa Shanker and Bhajan Laal are present these days.
May 28, 1931;
Ram Kishan went back. Munshi Jeevaa Ram and Rudrasen Ji came from Mainpuri. “Daliya” (coarsely grounded grain) in small quantity took in the night. Maheshwar Sahai alias “Massu” came from Bhogaon and narrated the “Nakshaa” (picture) of his happenings were in run. The homeopathic-treatment stopped from today.
May 30, 1931;
Took tub-bath.
Munshi Jeevaa Raam and Goswaamiji went back. Nanhe (Mahatma Raghuvar Dayal) along with “masturaat” ladies returned back from Orai. There is rumor about some un-usual happenings (unknown) spread in Kanpur, on account of which they did avoided to enter in.
Munshi Jeevaa Raam and Goswaamiji went back. Nanhe (Mahatma Raghuvar Dayal) along with “masturaat” ladies returned back from Orai. There is rumor about some un-usual happenings (unknown) spread in Kanpur, on account of which they did avoided to enter in.
May 31, 1931;
Jagmohan went to Etah to attend one Marriage-function, but via Bhogaon, purposely to stop Munshi proceeding for, scheduled to go Kanpur. Munshi (Mahatma Raadhaa Mohan Laal) returned back from Bhogaon and then went to Kanpur in the night at 03.30 A.M. Baabu Har Prasaad came from Fulera.
June 01, 1931;
Baabu Har Prasaad went back. There is a marriage-party of Jagat Narain son of Ram Saran Daas.
June 02, 1931;
Nanhe (Mahatma Raghuvar Dayaal) went to Fatehpur-Hasua, along with Jyoti (his second son, Jyotendra Mohan), to attend the marriage-party of Anande (Aanand Behari Laal). Withdrawn the pension in the day(noon-time).
June 04, 1931;
I took steam-bath to-day.
Jagmohan (my father) returned-back from Etah. Money-order of rupees ten only sent for Gwalior.
Jagmohan (my father) returned-back from Etah. Money-order of rupees ten only sent for Gwalior.
June 05, 1931;
I took steam-bath thrice, today. The Anande’s marriage-party has come back from Fatehpur. Parcel sent to Orai.
June 06, 1931;
Money-order of rupees twenty only has come from Orai. Medical-plaster of pindol (yellow soil used to smear the walls of the house) made pasted on the stomach.
June 07, 1931;
Bhajan Laal went back to Sikandrabaad in the morning. Munshi Manmohan Laal came from Sikandrabaad at 03.00 A.M. in the night. There was a ‘Garden-party’, in the house of Ratan Laal.
June 08, 1931;
Nanhe has sent Kharbuje (sweet melons, comes in the category of fresh-fruits), from Mainpuri. Munshi Sukhvaasi Laal has sent a money-order of rupees ten only .Khaan Bahaadur Abdul Khan Saaheb has honored to brought his presence.
June 09, 1931;
Feeling much weakness and on the spot of swelling (liver) feeling pain often on giving a touch. There is a feeling of unpleasing state of mood. Nanhe went back to Kanpur, along with, his family and Munshi Aatmaa Ram at 03.00 A.M. in the night.
June 10, 1931,
Munshi Manmohan Laal went back to Sikandrabaad. Ayodhya Nath Sahai (the younger brother of my grandmother)
came from Bareilly to attend the marriage-party of Vishambhar Naath. Baabu Rajendra Kumar came from Kanpur and went to attend the marriage-party of Shiv Shankar Laal. Maulawi Abdul Ghani Khan Saaheb has honored to brought his presence, from Bhogaon.
came from Bareilly to attend the marriage-party of Vishambhar Naath. Baabu Rajendra Kumar came from Kanpur and went to attend the marriage-party of Shiv Shankar Laal. Maulawi Abdul Ghani Khan Saaheb has honored to brought his presence, from Bhogaon.
Annotations;
Shri Ayodhya Nath Sahai is listed in one of the founder members of ‘Sri Ram Chandra Mission’ founded by Mahatma Ram Chandra (Baabu Ji) of Shahjahanpur, in the year of 1945.
June 12, 1931;
Rai Saaheb Indra Narain of Sakit came to see me in the night. Shashi Mukat Narain of Patiali came to see me in the morning.
June 13, 1931;
Ram Gopal came from Chhbrmau and went back. Ayodhya Nath Sahai also went back. Rajendra Kumar also went back to Agra. Thakur Tej Singh has come.
June 14, 1931;
Jagmohan went to attend the marriage-party of one, the son of Nanhe Baabu. Maharaaj Narain (his son-in-law, the husband of Krishna Kumaari alias ‘Babban’) went to Bulandshahar. Dina Naath came. Tonight suffered a severe attack of piles.
June 15, 1931;
Given ”tawajjo” (individual esoteric-attention) to Shiv Karan, twice, i.e. in the morning and again in the evening. Felt a pre-expected effect.
June 16, 1931;
Again given tawajjo to day (the same person, of previous day). Remain restless and could not sleep throughout the last night. Got obtained “Gangaa-jal” (the Holy-water of the river Gangese) in a “taulaa” (a small copper vessel).
June 17, 1931;
Jagmohan returned back from the marriage-party. My health-condition remain fit throughout the day long, felt no pain.
June 18,1931;
Kanhaiya Laal has come from Mainpuri, along with his whole family. One, the daughter of Shambhu Nath Vakil, who is the mother-in-law of Jamuna Swarup, came from Farrukhabad, along with all her children. Avadh Behari Laal of Allahabad came from his house. Shree Gopal came from Orai.
June 19, 1931;
Baabu Kanhaiya Laal and Shree Gopal Dass returned back to their respective places.
June 20,1931;
Pundit Shiv Narain Daas, alias ‘Gandhi Ji” came from Kanpur.
June 21, 1931;
Could intake very less.
June 22, 1931;
Pundit Shiv Narain Master went back to Kanpur at 10.00 A.M. in the morning. The girl of Farrukhabad, i.e. the mother-in-law of Jamuna Swarup, went back. Could take nothing in the food.
June 23, 1931;
Baabu Ram Chandra came today from Shahjahanpur and brought fresh fruits with him.
Today’s the main food I took was the fresh fruits, brought by him. Basked with warmth-cloth. In the noon. A letter of Govardhan Daass has come in respect of “rukhsat” (permission to call his house). The reply given then and there.
June 24, 1931;
Noticed the discharge of red-colored urine; redness mixed with heat. Passed the hot medical-plaster of “pindol” (yellow soiled smear). Pundit Ram Narain Guard came from Bulandshahar. Parcels received from Dehraadoon of Lychee(litchi) and the mixed fresh-fruits from Lucknow
June 25, 1931;
Maataa Charan, Ram Chandra, Ram Narain Guard and Shyaamaa(his married daughter) are present. Took steam-bath today again. Money order of rupees ten only has been sent by Seetaa Ram in charity-fund from Lucknow Bareilly
Annotations;
“Maataa Charan” is his the same disciple, who endowed his total movable and immovable property in favor of the ‘Samaadhi’ of his Master Laalaaji, situated in ‘Navadia’, road-side at “Kanpur-Road” in Fatehgarh (U P), India and the ‘Trust’ so formed under the ‘Religious Endowment Act’, is still in existence.
June 28, 1931,
Started to use “Tuqhm-kaashmi” (an Unaani medicine) from today. Maataa Charan went back. Sent a letter sent the Rampur-state for “Suaal-e-Umari” (a book in Persian; written on Hazrat ‘Omar’, the second khalifa of Muslims).
July 01, 1931;
Did a gap for ‘steam-bath’. Baabu Avadh Behari Laal came from his home-town to proceed for Allahabad
July 02, 1931;
Went to draw the pension. While I was on the evening walk, there I come across a storm to come on mixed with a heavy rain-fall, on account of which, remain sitting in the house of Abdul Rahamaan Khaan Saaheb Vakil up to 09.00 P.M. in the night. Baabu Ram etc came from Farrukhabad. Slept in the night on the first floor of the house, in the Jagmohan’s portion.
Annotations;
This was his last pension drawn by, he went to receive himself. My mother used to tell, “he had gifted a silver coin worth rupee one only (embossed the image of George V
 |
| My Mother Bhagavati Devi. |
After the demise of my father she became the possessor of the two such coins. One out of which, she gifted to my wife, Dr.(Mrs.) Suman Saxena, on the day of publication of the autobiography of ‘Laalaa ji Maharaj’ compiled by her, in first person, under the title ’Divya Kranti Kee Kahaani’ as a love-token.
This distinctive mark (benediction-incarnated) of her (Suman’s) Grand Spiritual Prefect, Rev. Laalaa Ji Maharaj, passed through her respected mother-in-law, she has preserved as one of her most valuable Jewellery. The English-version of this eminent book has recently been published by- B.R. Publishing Corporation, 425, Nimri colony, Ashok Vihar, Phase-IV, Delhi-110052. ISBN 817646744-8, in addition it translation in French is also under process of publication.
July 03, 1931;
It was nicely a cold day. On account of bodily weakness, I could not go for the morning-walk. Fibres are coming mixed with my urine, I guess. Baabu Umaa Shankar and Baabu Basant Laal have come from Kasganj. The daughter of Kaaleshwar Prasaad has come. It was a heavy rain-fall, today.
July 04, 1931;
Feeling acute weakness today. The urine I passed, was dark red. Again a heavy rain-fall. Baabu Bhajan Laal came from Kanpur
July o5,1931;
On account of heavy rain-fall, could not go for walk, neither in the morning nor in the evening. Rameshwar Prasaad has sent fruits from Lucknow
July 06, 1931;
Today also I could not go out due to the rain-fall. Dr. Shyam Laal has been blessed with a son on 3rd July and a son has also born in the family of Peshkaar Saaheb. A very high temperature attacked on me tonight and the umbilical-cord got disordered, remain restless all through.
July 07, 1931;
Today also, I am under high-temperature. Satchitanand gave me steam-bath by his own hands. Twenty rupees have come from Orai, In the evening I discharged a loose motion which cleared off my stomach. In the night the temperature went down after a much sweat.
July 08, 1931,
Feeling much weakness today.
July 09, 1931;
Nothing happened worth-mentioning. The stomach-condition remained such on account of which, there was difficulty in breathing. In the evening I cold go for walk a little.
July 10, 1931;
Today I bought the biography of Hazrat Mujaddid Alfsaani Rahamat Ullah Alehi (May god be merciful on him) in rupees two and seven anas. Baabu Dilaram has sent a money order of rupees twenty, including rupees ten for the charity. Today there was Chhathi (the ceremonial observations of the sixth day after the bierth of the child), all the ladies of the house had gone there.
July 11, 1931;
Could not take tub-bath today.
July 12, 1931;
Today also I could not take tub-bath. Baabu Umaa Shankar from Kasganj and Pundit Rameshwar Prasaad from Shahjahanpur have come. Baabu Govardhan Daass has come from Etah for the rukhsat (departure of a bride back from her husband’s home). Took diner. Took Unaani medicine in the night.
July 13, 1931;
Munshi Govardhan Daas and Baabu Umaa Shankar went back, in the morning. Rukhsat (of my mother) did not effected. Intake the Unaani prescription. Ram Kishan went back to Bhogaon.
July 14, 1931;
Wife of Peshkaar Saaheb is seriously ill. Could not intake any thing, because the treatment of Unaani medicine has inflated the pus. Ram Kishan Laal went back. Puttu Laal Teacher has come.
July 15, 1931;
Putt Laal and Ahibaran Singh went back. The medical plaster of ‘Pindol’ put today. Dr. Chaturbhuj Sahai
Annotation;
and Baabu Avadh Behari Laal has come from Etah.
 |
| Dr.Chaturbhuj Sahai. |
Dr. Chaturbhuj Sahay Ji, personified the maxim, "The more spiritual a person is, the more he is human" in his daily life, and was free from any kind of pose or pretension. His heart was flowing with love and service for everyone. Never sparing himself in paying due attention to anyone who sought his help, he had all of the qualities of an ideal Guru and was habitually found in a meditative mood. Perhaps his greatest quality was that he never saw a difference between himself and others. He was not the least obsessed by notions of distinction that he himself was the Enlightened One, while others around him were languishing in the darkness of ignorance. His firmness of self-possession could not be shaken under any circumstances, and he was never perturbed. Tranquility was writ large on his face. He lived the life of a family man fully and unshakably, with a daily life marked with normalcy. He set an excellent example of how to combine spiritual idealism with domestic life. Serving his wife and children to the last, he mindfully attended to all domestic duties.
In 1930, Guru Maharaj, Paramsant Dr. Chaturbhuj Sahay Ji, established Ramashram Satsang Mathura (RSM) (naming it after his Guru,Lala Ji Maharaj, Paramsant Sri Ram Chandra Ji) out of the northern Indian town of Mathura. As per the directive of his Guru, he propagated a System of Meditation adaptable by people of any religion, community or race. This system is especially suited for our busy and demanding lives in today's world. If we shape our lifestyles and mold our thought processes according to it, spiritual success can be achieved effortlessly. We can learn to live a peaceful life amidst the stress.
and Baabu Avadh Behari Laal has come from Etah.
July 16,1931;
Did take ‘steam-bath’ both the times; felt much vigor after the evening’s time. Baabu Avadh Behari Laal went back.
July 17, 1931;
Dr. Chaturbhuj Sahai made me start the Homeopathic-treatment from today. Nanhe from Kanpur, Munshi Madan Mohan Laal from Tilhar, Baabu Vishnu Dayaal from Tilhar and Baabu Karunaa Shankar from Shahjahanpur have come .today. feeling more weakness as compared than the previous day. The stomach became tough tonight.
July 18, 1931;
Baabu Maharaaj Narain Agrawaal came from Kanpur and went back in the evening Nanhe went to Farrukhabad.
July 19, 1931;
Dr. Chaturbhuj Sahai and Jagmohan along with his wife, went to Etah. Could not sleep through out the night; the stomach went swelled. Feeling very acute weakness today. Shyam Laal came from Bulandshahar. There was “Dashthaun” (name giving ceremony) in the house of Peshkaar Saaheb. Munshi Madan Mohan Laal and Vishnu Dayaal went back to Shahjahanpur.
July 21, 1931;
Jagmohan along with “dulahan” (his wife) and the wife of Dr. Chaturbhuj Sahai came back from Etah. In the night and also during the day time, noticed swelling in the stomach. Much rainfall during night time.
July 22, 1931;
Ram Prasaad returned back from Delhi and brought a tub from Sikandrabaad with him. There was much inconstant all the night through, in addition, the mosquitoes too bitten much, There has been a heavy rain-fall through the day. Sent money orders sent to Gwalior, Unnao and Sirsaganj.
July 23, 1931;
Suffered from the breath convulsively, all the day long. Rameshwar Prasaad retuned back to Shahjahanpur. Could sleep after 12.00 O’clock in the night, after that the problem of breathing became set right and went on sleeping.
July 24, 1931;
Mrs. Chhote Laal (popularly known as Kaali mem)
came to see me. She has diagnosed the swelling of liver. All the a long there was an extremely hot night; remaining feeling restlessness, could not sleep and the mosquitoes bite, in addition.
came to see me. She has diagnosed the swelling of liver. All the a long there was an extremely hot night; remaining feeling restlessness, could not sleep and the mosquitoes bite, in addition.
July 25, 1931;
Hardly could intake any thing, swelling on the liver has increased. Could not sleep through out the night.
July 26, 1931;
A boy from Mainpuri, who lives in the hostel, has come. Could not go for morning walk due the acute weakness. Baabu Umaa Shankar along with one, his relative came from Kasganj and went back. Karunaa Shanker went back to Shahjahanpur. Nanhe went back to Kanpur at 03.00 O’clock. All the night long could not sleep due to the heat.
July 27, 1931;
Doctor Saaheb Baabu Purushottam Daas, Fatehgarh and Baabu Jagannath Prasaad Vakil came to see me. Continued blowing a pleasant breeze, and I could sleep nicely too. He (Dr. P. N. Vatsal; said to have “Purushottam Daas”) has diagnosed- “asthma”.
July 28, 1931;
Dr. Shree Krishna and Dr. Shyam Laal came from Etah, in the evening.
July 29, 1931;
Proceeded by car today in the morning by car at 05.00 O’clock towards Kanpur, along with Dr. Shree Krishna Laal and Dr. Shyam Laal, reaching thereby at the destination at 09.00 A.M. Baabu Rajendra Kumar camped there. Meeting with Baabu Hari Krishna the professor of Persian. Remain camping in Kanpur. Maataa Charan came there by train.
July 30, 1931;
Proceeded by car from Kanpur to Lucknow in the morning at 07.00 O’clock. It was raining through-out the journey, right from Kanpur. Ram Prasaad, Maataa Charan and Jyoti Baabu came by train. Got examined by Dr. Gupta Ji.
July 31, 1931;
The urine got tested in the laboratory. Got examined by Dr. Pyaare Laal. Shifted to the ‘rest-house’. The stomach did not “phooaa” (grained) tonight.
August 01, 1931;
Dr. Pyaare Laal Ji came to see me again and started the treatment from today. The stomach is grained right since morning. A doze of “Syphilinun” -200 given to me. Baabu Ram Chandra, Raameshwar Prasaad and Baabu Shree Ram came from Shahjahanpur..
August 02, 1931;
“Antimonium Crudum”-200 given to me. There was a greater type of “afaaraa” (surfeit) during night and there was a pain below the navel. Right since the morning the stomach is swelling. Throughout the day and night feeling extremely in distress. No wind passing, the stomach is over-filled. Two tablets of purgative, but no result. Baabu Sreepat Sahai and Baabu Brij Behari Laal came from Mainpuri.
August 03, 1931;
No motion at all, despite the double doze of purgatives; too much pain and stomach is over flowing. Proceeded by car from Lucknow. Got examined by Bakshi Ji in the evening. At 08.00 O’clock in the nighr a medical-plaster got put. A bit relief during the night, nothing given to intake. Dr, Shyam Laal and others went back by car.
August 04, 1931;
Nothing given to intake in the morning. A bath of the vinegar mixed with ice has been given, in the morning and soon after it the same medical-plaster, as during the last night, got put, as a result the pain in the abdomen went increased. All the day long remain restless and in passion-tide. The pain reduced as a result of warming with a hot-wet flannel-cloth, and the wind passed. Got examined by Pundit Chhote Laal Vaidya, who diagnosed the primary stage of dropsy. But I do not feel so.
=============================================================
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| Firaq. |
"अब तुम से रुक्सत होता हूँ ,
लो आओ संभालो साजे ग़ज़ल.
नए तराने छेढ़ो;
मेरे नगमों को नींद आती है "
===========================================================Laalaaji’s ‘MAIL-ALBUM’
 |
| Mirza Ghalib. |
"दे के ख़त यूं देखता है नामावर ;
कुछ तो अभी पैगामे जुबानी ;
और है ... ... ..."
[The postman gives a purposeful look on face of the addressee that there is some more, verbal message beyond the contents warped within the envelop.]
(1.)”Fatehgarh; dated April 19, 1929;
Received your letter. May God motivate you to go towards the Truth! I shall be very happy when you meet me. I do not know the mesmerism, even the least. Moreover, this path leads towards darkness. If you have merely the desire for mesmerism, then you need not to take trouble. I am basically only for the names sake and I have diverted my vision towards God. I do not know other than this. If you have desire concerning the self-realization, then this humble fellow shall remain be waiting for.”
(2)”Fatehgarh; dated June 16, 1929;
You have written: ‘I felt worried at heart, when I did not receive the reply’. The reply in the form of alphabets and the words written on paper give a sort of solace. This proves that the nature and worldly objects also provide contentment and happiness, but it may be temporary and for the short duration.
The real thing as what is required from you and every being and the same exists within, only the vibration of the thought is needed. This vibration of thought can be obtained at the attendance on the Satguru (Satsang). The true association with the equal beings. Equal beings are called human-beings (living Gurus). When human beings gets the association of a capable human being, then one acquires vibrations, power, and the peace. And this method is sufficient to serve the needs of an inquisitive person. A capable human is an image of body and soul. Similarly a man and also the bad man are made up of body and soul, both. The soul is expanded every where and is in an unlimited form.
The soul gets benefit from both, near as well as from far-off. But since the body is limited and is in gross form, it gets beefit and harm frm the near. It means that body and soul are very deeply intermingled. Hence, in the beginning there falls the need for nearness, as well as face to face association. Without this, one does not gain benefit as one should obtain in the beginning. If some one has such a capability that one can obtain benefit and instructions through thought from distance, then one does not have need for obtaining instructions and that to from some special person. He himself is capable. Why should a capable one (living Guru) search for? If there is not such capability, then there is need to come close to, face to face, because without it the purpose can not be served upon.
You want to have vocal and written instructions through letters, it can be and it also happens so. But this is of the level as it is one’s status. What ought to be; that can not be obtained. Therefore, please find feasibility to come and see me at least once, or if I could get opportunity, I shall see you”.
(3) “Fatehgarh dated; August 23, 1930: Received letter. Gone through the condition 0f. All is well here. I stayed for about fifteen-sixteen days at Sikandrabaad in district Bulandshahar and was having the medical treatment of (my) daughter. But was of no avail, and ultimately she passed away. She was got married last year. The “amaanat” (entrusted one), it belonged to, went back.
The letter of … … … comes often and this poor-fellow has a lot of love (with him). I am also immensely pleased. I always love the poor ones and the reason is that these people wish me and the moneyed people are intoxicated with their wealth. In my opinion, the real attachment, he has intense with”.
(4) “Fatehgarh dated; October 25, 1930. Whatever impetus descends from the side of God; one stars doing likewise. None of the created one has any authority in to it. Therefore, when ever the time will come, (and) they will start doing as God ordains”.
(5)“Fatehgarh dated; December 31, 1930. Went highly pleased on going through the condition of your (spiritual) promotion. I do have trust in His kind-selffor even more than this promotion.
Those who, themselves have been spoiled and also cause others to utter ruin of; may God give guidance and bestow pity on them.
I have received today one letter of respected Abdul Ghani Saaheb from Sawai Madhopur. I was highly pleased. You belong to a great family and is son of “Pir” (a spiritual-prefect). Your right is hereditary. This “khaaksaar” (humble self) is one of the “tufailion” (parasitically), well, whatever service I could render through His (Maulaana Abdul Ghani Khaan Saaheb) “Nisbat” (spiritual connection), I shall much “fakhr” (just a pride) I shall send rply to his letter, tomorrow.”
(6) “Fatehgarh dated February 04, 1931. Brother! There happens to be two types of desires often with motive for the people. One is that the main purpose is to realize God and the other is to make one-self His true servant.. And with that purpose that purpose they desire to go to sages and the saints and by means of same, often they fulfill their worldly-desires through the grace of God. But, even if God’s devotion and search, their worldly-desires are not got satisfied, they do not grieve the least, and do they care for their desires were not fulfilled as per their wish, because their main purpose was God and not the worldly enjoyment. Such persons are one or two among thousands. But the other type of people are found in large number. This is as such that they worship God only for worldly sake. Their real objective lies in the world. But on the way, if in the company and preaching of sages and saints awaken their tendency, they my achieve God and some times their worldly purpose is also served and some times not. If the worldly needs are not fulfilled, they become depressed to cultivate wrong belief and their faith in the sages and saints gets lost and finally neither they get world nor the way towards God..
It is sad, such type of people are seen every where and the people found choosing the path of God is none.
The persons who cherish my services, please arrange one place so as possibly they could meet me and if possibly at one place, you yourself search out the suitable place. But this task will be difficult without your inclination. Whenever you get time, write me in details.”
“(7) Bulandshahar ; May 23, 1931;
My condition is that of sickness and the (consequent ) weakness. Surpassingly I can not come and those people do not have the means to come (here). What can be done. Oral talks do not serve any purpose. What can a man achieve, with out sacrifice?”
‘Incoming letter’
“(8) Fatehgarh : June 02, 1931;
True Guide Sir; Life-based beneficent Ramchandra Ji Saaheb!
Accept the obeisance in your service in your service from this humble, poor, sinful fellow in your Holy-feet.
I feel fortunate to receive your graceful letter of 28th May after the congregation function. But could not get relief from the restlessness on account of your bad health.
O Master! You take care of all the servants and relieve of their ailments, but your health is not good. This poor fellow is deeply pained over it. Therefore, O Ocean of Benevolence! Bestow so much strength to the servant at your feet that I could assimilate in my own body all the pangs of your high esteemed soul and shall be pleased to find in my body and bear them.
O Master I did not consider it proper to inform the condition as mentioned below, but helplessly I have written it because this humble fellow has failed in. But why so?
I should be bestowed strength for it so that to succeed in future and to feel myself fortunate enough.
O Benefactor! The appeal is as such that your good self has told that your health is not good, one should not sit before you for meditation, because instead of welfare there are chances of getting harmed as the sickness may get transferred..
I become highly pleased to learn it that this poor fellow found the treasure-house. This hope got established in me that now the Master will not remain sick. And later continued sitting on both the occasions with this idea that all the sickness of Master recede in to my body. But alas! It did not occur so. Perhaps it was because of me being undeserving and did not have real love in me as it ought to have been.
If there is any slackness, O Master! This too is your gift. Gracefully infuse the prime strength. Kindly do not reluctant because this body is also yours but called with my name due to Maayaa (illusions). This mind and body is yours. I do not have wealth and nor do I wish for. Whatever I have is yours. Bestow in me true love to your feet. This is the wish the humble fellow.
All the rest is well and happy by your Grace.”
(09) Fatehgarh; June, 1931.
Received your letter with full of sympathy; got consolation.
(10) Fatehgarh; February 02, 1928.
The amount sent through dear……..reached to me. Your benefaction is being send to a genuine place. The son of my Spiritual Master, who was out of placement, therefore, it had been delivered to him. Now His young lady is in need of, hence will send there and it has been sent.
May God help you to fill full and remain being established in respectful position.
(11) Fatehgarh; July 15, 1928.
Pray to God having full faith in Him. These days the time is very delicate. If there is no reality (in the case) then the verdict will be impartial. Keeping your tong shut and uttering no words against anybody, be solely dependant on God, Hr will help you. In respect of your ailing child and his treatment, I have already sent a mention through a post-card.
I suppose that there must happen some shortfall in his care and attendance etc. regarding which I have no knowledge.
(12) Fatehgarh Satsang; October 05, 1928.
Got the detailed state of affairs. What ever you have written is correct. Effort is also necessary and God too will help. You pleas do attempt, God is great. I am taking ‘Tub-bath’. There is sufficient improvement and I hope it will further be fruitful.
Possibly there may be some hidden benefits and these apparently appear to be a loss. What ever happens from the side of God is always good. Apparently it is such that in the celebrations of Shri … … … there appears some shortcomings, but certainly the Gods will might be somewhat otherwise.
(13) Fatehgarh; dated September 14, 1928.
In respect of your condition, my opinion is that, you should every thing on God’s will. God alone knows better the position about you and us. What happens naturally by itself will be for the well-being. I shell pray God to bestow you help as what is suitable on your part. The girl has good knowledge of language and in Sanskrit, she has been taught the first book of Pandit santavalekar. After that no teacher was available thus could not be arranged. But that girl has a very sharp intellect and good memory. She has intense desire for further studies. If she is provided with the opportunity for education, she will do fine even now. Your wife has already seen here her health and features.
It would be better if other matters are also got settled; and after that ‘he’ can see himself. I prefer that it is good to have initial clarities. Later if the girl suffers, that will be not be good.
These days, those who pass the ‘entrance-examination’ with Hindi language, she is far better than them. She has gone through hundreds of journals and the other books. Shri … … … might have sent letter from Moradabad. Rest all is well.
The marriage of dear Brij Mohan has been settled in Fatehgarh for ether 30th April or the May 10th.
(14) Fatehgarh; dated July 05 1928.
Went through all-about. The time does not remain the same, always. Often this way and often that way. What is God’s will shell happen. Man is helpless, one should pray to Him. The results are in His hands. So long as the original activator, who has don it, does not go off from your sight, the influence shell persist. When it moves out of sight, after a few days, the matter will subside. Undoubtedly the matter should not be reported in writing. Their may be some secret document, but the condition shell always not remain the same.
This allegation has been inflicted on you in self-defense. What to talk of such nuisance as they are in all the clans and society.
(15) Fatehgarh;
The time does not remain invariably the same. If you live always reserve, it leads the such consequences. In general to remain reserve is not bad.
People do not please under such circumstances. But if, even the least ego or selfhood is involved in, people do feel it and cultivate hatred. Now I do not know what sort of reservation would have been. Well, it is not liable for discussion now.
It occurs definitely, what is destined to happen. If you had been meeting them, you would have been encouraged to see others. One should always keep faith in God and continue praying to. What ever the opportunity for non-attached recommendation, one should try for it. Do not carry with you on tours. You may feel it shameful. I do not find any shame in it. Whereto ever you are posted, the assigned job must be performed.
It is difficult to have always the same circumstances. I am of the opinion as not to do any interference. Silently remain careful pertaining to one’s self-defense. What to write further! I shell pray to God.
(16) Fatehgarh;
Your letter arrived and became pleased. I always pray for your good health and for your love in God should continue. Such is the nature of man that the circumstances are often of one sort and often otherwise.
One should not worry over it. Both are His conditions, therefore, under all circumstances He should be remembered, then no condition will cause influence. If man is devoid of His remembrance, there will be the influence of ‘good’ or ‘bad’.
(17) Fatehgarh; dated April 17, 1918.
There should be grace of God. He always bestows His mercy. Whatsoever has happened is His mystery. One should forbear every issue with immense peace. I pray that all your works should be performed well and should increase day to day in the feeling of devotion towards God. Keep informing me regarding your condition.
(18) Fatehgarh; dated September 28,1917.
These days there are very few visitors are in circulation; or say have almost stopped. This is the influence of fight and revolution and its effect is falling on hearts.
(19) Fatehgarh; dated November 10, 1916.
The post-card reached and I am replying it without delay. You have thought out a good trick that I have been driven to reply you immediately or else I am very lazy and thus committing a sort of moral fault. Everybody is well here.
(20) Fatehgarh;
When God wishes, then it happens likewise. Now whatever is the condition, is a piece of good fortune. Keep attention towards Him and remain submerged in His love.
(21) Fatehgarh; dated March 28, 1918.
Your post-card arrived here. I had asked the boys to send the receipt, they did not do it. The sweets sent was extremely delicious and specially there was immense sweetness of love in it.
(22) Fatehgarh; dated April 10, 1927.
I pray, may God bestow grace so that your matters are got settled. The period of my service till now has remained such that what ever the officers were, did not have any concern with me, there is no reason to poke my nose in that affair. I did the job assigned to me, got completed and that’s all. Hence my opinion is that, even if there is no mistake and in order to get rid of that matter, one should beg excuse. There would be no feeling of insult in it, provided the begging excuse does not create any particular proof of commitment through it. As I neither have full knowledge of the incident nor I know the flexibility of the event. Therefore, am unable to give the appropriate opinion, how ever I have numerous experiences of mutual compromise.
(23) Fatehgarh; dated May 02, 1927.
Non-perception of light does not seem any harm. The thoughts are some times perplexing and some times they remain calm. There is nothing special in it as while treading the path of all sorts of thoughts do recur. There has only been for short duration in our mutual association, does not mean to be a proper training provided to you.
(24) Fatehgarh; dated September 16, 1927.
May God bless long life to the newly born infant. The venerable ones, who are with us, they do have all care, slowly and slowly there will be improvement in moral innovation. Every thing, lies in the hands of God. Why should you worry for it? Rest all is doing well.
(25) Fatehgarh; dated April 10, 1927.
I felt sorry, but it was destined to happen. My heart was already having such premonition, because the operation was one sided and conspiring. The transfer is good enough as an adverse entry in the service book harms. If the suspension period is not well settled, this punishment is too much. An appeal would be a must then. I shell possibly be going to Orai along with the children up to 2nd or 3rd May. But all this depends on the God’s choice. These days I am alone at home.
Rest all is doing well.
The work and efforts made are inspiring, motivating and guiding in the path of spirituality. It is also need of time. With kind regards.
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